I had a conversation today that got me thinking about why I blog or post on Facebook about certain things. Why open myself up like that. Last week I put up a post on Facebook about how Miss. S was picked on by some older kids and how sad that made me. It got a lot of responses and I thought it was really interesting to read all the comments. Whether we agree or disagree on a topic I love a good discussion. I think that social media has opened up a lot of doors to have a more open dialogue about the things that effect our daily lives. Certain things I would never post about here or on Facebook. Politics being one of them. But things like how to handle a bully, or breast feeding are things that I feel ok bringing up in a public forum such as this. I feel like there is a lot to gain from starting a discussion on some of the issues we face in our lives. You can get a lot of great suggestions and help from what other people have gone through. Also by sharing our experiences with others we may be helping and supporting someone with something that they are dealing with in their life at that moment with out even knowing. When I posted about Breast feeding it wasn't to gain sympathy from others (although all the out pouring of support was amazing). I thought by sharing my experience maybe someone else could gain something from it. Also I felt it was important to breach a subject about how woman should support one another and not be so judgmental. When I did the book review on Baby Wise it wasn't to say that one way of parenting a newborn is better than others. It was to share what worked for us and to get feed back from others about what worked for them (BTW Baby #2 is doing quite well on Baby Wise so far). I'll say it again. I love a good discussion. I love reading your comments (so please leave more). Usually when I bring something up it's because it's something I am struggling with or need help with. I love seeing everyone's different views. I learn so much from it. I will never post something with the intention to offend anyone. So if you are offended by a topic, post or comment then I apologize. I try to be very respectful toward the views of others. I feel like most people are really respectful and contribute to a good healthy dialogue. We live in a time where we are lucky to have the technology that gives us a platform for discussion. I hope that I can continue to have these moments of great learning from those of you who read this blog or who I'm friends with on Facebook. It has enriched my life and I plan to continue posting about things that matter to me. Thanks for all your wonderful feedback. I hope that you gain as much from it as I do.
I know I promised a DIY accessory a couple days ago and I didn’t deliver. I’m really sad about it but I came down with another killer bout of mastitis. Which brings me to this post about Breast Feeding. I've had a lot of thoughts on this subject the last couple days and I just want to vent a moment.
When I was preparing to have Miss. S I remember having a conversation with Denny about whether I was going to breast feed or not. I told him I didn’t care either way. That I would try breast feeding but if it didn’t work out then I would go to formula. After she was born it was a whole different story. I all of a sudden felt this over whelming desire to breast feed exclusively. Like it was my duty to give this little girl the best nutrition possible for her. There were a lot of other reasons why it was important to me also. However she did not take to it very easily. It took her two weeks of crying, sleepless nights, appointments with lactation consultants, over a pound of weight lost, but she eventually got it. I breast feed her for a year. Those first two weeks though were probably two of the hardest weeks I have ever experienced. It wasn’t smooth sailing after that, but it did get easier. Unfortunately in that year I got mastitis probably 8 times. I know that you are thinking I’m straight up crazy for continuing to breast feed after having mastitis even twice. It really feels like your dying. But I was determined and I felt like I had to.
Now I have this new little boy. He’s six weeks old and already I have had mastitis twice. It’s like nothing I ever experienced with Miss. S. It is so much worse. A couple nights ago I had a break down because of this internal war over to keep breast feeding or to stop. I was feeling overwhelming guilt over wanting to stop. I was in so much pain and I was so very sick that it just seemed like I couldn’t go on with it. There was a lot to consider though with the decision. We already know that he is sensitive to milk. His pediatrician told us to use a specific formula if we choose to go that route. That formula costs $21 for a 12 ounce can. That right there made me think that I had to keep on going with breast feeding. There are so many reasons though as to why I wanted to keep going, but the cost was a big part. Also the knowledge that breast is best. I didn’t want to compromise and give him something that isn’t as nutritious.
I feel like a lot of times woman feel like they have to breast feed no matter what and if they don’t then they feel like they are looked down upon. I know a lot of woman feel guilty if they don’t or they can’t. I know that these feelings are wrong. Formula fed babies are just as healthy and happy as breast fed babies. My sister has fed all three of her children soy (Gasp!) formula and they are super healthy, smart, talented kids. Mothers should not feel guilty about the decision to go to formula. I do feel like there is a lot of pressure to breast feed. From doctor’s, from birthing classes, from the media (yeah not every woman is blessed to have perfect boobs like you Giselle), certain social circles, family members or friends. I think the pressure is pretty unfair. If a mother gives breast feeding a good try and it just doesn’t work for them they shouldn’t be judged in a negative light. There really is no reason to feel guilty… but I did feel guilty…
Until I went to the doctor yesterday. She made the decision really easy for me. She told me flat out to stop. She related her own struggles with mastitis. How with her first child she had it three times the final time landing her in the hospital for surgery. How she almost lost her breast. She highly encouraged me to pump exclusively. Honestly when she said that my heart sunk a little. I hate pumping. She made a good case for it though. Your baby still gets all the benefits of breast milk. Instead of feeding for 40 min. every three hours you pump for 20 every three hours. Anyone can help with feedings. So Denny can take a night time shift every now and then and we can leave him with Grandma if we want a date night. She also pointed out that $21 a can is a lot cheaper than a hospital stay and surgery. So if we needed to supplement with formula then we need to keep that in mind. She said I needed to consider my safety and happiness. If I’m constantly sick or struggling with breast feeding I’m not going to be a very happy Mom. So that’s it. I was sold. Every other Doctor or lactation consultant told me there wasn’t anything I could do. I just had to tough it out. I appreciated her advice so much. Toughing it out was just not working any longer. And you know what I don’t feel the slightest bit of guilt.
So I'm sorry about the lack of posting this week. I could hardly hold my baby let alone type out post. I'll get caught up over the weekend though and hopefully I'll have those DIY's ready for Monday!
I mentioned before that I probably wouldn't do anything big for St. Patrick's Day this year. I do want to make it more fun in the future, but this year we just have a lot going on. This morning we woke up early for a Dr.'s appointment so we got drive thru breakfast tacos. So instead of green milk in our cereal we had green milk with our snack of mint oreos. Of coarse we all wore green as to not get pinched. Really though we didn't do anything too out of the ordinary. Miss. S and I met up with some friends to see Tangled at the dollar theaters. So I guess that was a little bit special. Now we are at home relaxing. I think we may go for a walk and hunt for four leaf clovers in a little bit. But that's pretty much it. How do you celebrate St. Patrick's Day with your kids? Do you have any fun traditions?
Monday's are the days I sit down and pour over recipe books, magazines, web sites and more to try to decide what to make for the week. I'm really bad at meal planning. I like fast, easy, healthy meals, that don't require a lot of ingredients. Sundays are the exception as I usually like to make a nicer dinner on Sunday and dessert. During the week however I go for easy. I have somewhat of a formula. Certain days I set aside for certain things. Like every Friday is sandwich night, and we usually eat out on Saturdays. Thursdays are dedicated to left overs. But Mondays give me a head ache. This week I decided to try to plan several weeks at a time so I don't have to stress every Monday about meals. I like to cook I just don't like planning and preparing for it. I found a great website that has several free printables to help with things like this. Some great tools to help keep you organized. It's called Mommy Tracked. Today I decided to utilize the eat sheet. I'm hoping it will give me some direction. How do you handle the task of planning your families meals?
I think this year is the first year I've ever looked at a fake tree and wished I had one. I've always been a firm believer of going to pick out the perfect REAL Christmas Tree. I would even love to go out to one of the Christmas Tree Farms not too far from where we live to get one (Here and Here). I would do it every year just for the fresh scent it brings to my home. This year though I didn't exactly get to pick out my own tree. My wonderful husband picked one up on his way home from work. And although it is a beautiful tree, even a grand tree, it has it's flaws. Mainly it's dryness. Our house is riddled with needles right now. I'm kind of envying the cleanliness and symmetry of a fake tree. So what do you do in your family? Real? Fake? Every other year you switch it up? And why do you do what you do? Above is my favorite Christmas Tree we have ever had. It felt a little Charlie Brownish to me. Little and scrawny, but perfect.
